Want a better relationship or a relationship that is as flawless a Wes and I’s? Then this blog is for you!
Guys if you don’t know us, we are extremely sarcastic and definitely don’t have a flawless relationship! We may not be experts but we like to pretend. So we thought it would be good to share with you what works for us!
SO if you want to be as “healthily dysfunctional” as us, go listen to our podcast episode #15 (How to make your relationship not suck) and enjoy this blog!
Here we go, the Top 10 ways to make your relationship not suck:
by Wes and Jodie Chapman
As Wes and I talk about on the podcast communication is one of the most important tips you can do! 99% of fights are caused by miscommunication so communicating clearly and purposely can make all the difference in how you feel, act and talk. Its so important to be open with each other and really get down to the bottom of things. Because without communication your really just creating resentfulness and holding onto feelings that need to be let out in a healthy way!
I think to be in a relationship with anyone (including yourself) you need lots of patience. Things, people ad situations can get very frustrating so having patience with yourself and one another can be relationship changing. No one is perfect and things aren’t always going to work out the way you want. So be patient and understanding in your relationship.
Now I know what you are thinking and NO this isn’t “role-playing” lol that is for another blog another time. This is all about finding your role and the part you play in your life and your families life. Without knowing your talent, hobbies, likes and “jobs” in the family you’ll never fully be able to be a successful working household. In the podcast Wes and I talk a lot about what roles we play. From being a stay at home mom to a working dad. What works best for us may not work for everyone. So find what flows with your family and your partner.
Nothing makes a person feel better than when they are validated! Having someone acknowledge your hard work, feelings or accomplishments is so rewarding! Fellas this is one that will make your lady go weak in the knees! Making the TIME to VALIDATE how he or she feels will not only strengthen your relationship but also make her want to jump your bones! ***Guarantee bone jumpage if you do it right!*** When a women feels heard its like it unlocks her sexual goddess she’s been hiding. You’re welcome.
You cannot, I repeat CANNOT have a healthy happy relationship if you are not honest. No matter how hard it may be, honesty is the key! If you can’t have trust and honesty in your relationship than what do you really have? You have nothing. This also ties in with Tip #1 in communication. Know how to communicate your honesty and know how to accept someones honest feelings. Its a two-way street and if you aren’t both obeying the street signs you’ll have a head-on collision. Few relationships survive without honesty.
Wes screws up all the time. Like for reals he’s the worst LOL! He says things that come out wrong. Makes mistakes, and does things backward (in all seriousness he’s a pretty good guy and I guess I make mistakes too….. rarely 😉 But If we don’t forgive one and other for stupid comments, fights, arguments etc then we start to build resentment. When you forgive, truly forgive! Don’t bring it up again! Wes and I joke on the podcast about holding onto things and throwing them at one another later on in life but guys don’t. It will only sabotage your relationship.
R.E.S.P.E.C.T!! I honestly can’t spell respect without singing the song! LOL true story. Anyway this one is huge! Respecting your partner is crucial. Whether it be in person or when they are not around. There is nothing that gets Wes and I more fired up than when a group of people sit around and talk sh*t about their other half. You guys STOP!!!! Your partner is your teammate. Uplift one another, respect each other, and treat each other how you want to be treated, if not better! I have this conversation with our kids all the time. You get what you put out and how you treat others is most likely how they are going to treat you back. Period.
Not everything is about you. I know that was world-shattering to hear but guys come on. When you have a partner it can’t always be about you. The definition of being selfless is this: “someone who is concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than with one’s own; unselfish.” Now don’t get me wrong, you are still super important! Just don’t put your wants before your partners needs and visa versa. Trust me, having a selfless relationship makes for a smoother sea.
#9 Have Fun
Quit stressing! Remember when you first dated and would go bowling, or mini golfing or just had fun?? Well go have fun together! Go do something that will make you laugh and really enjoy just being with each other. Put on your “kid hats” for a min and go swing on some swings, run around a park, act like a 7 year old! Let go of the stress, responsibility and “adulting” for a min. Because couples who have fun together stay together. Boom.
Yep I had to include sex in here at least once! Guys sex is so important in a relationship. I’m not talking about “wham, bam thank you mam sex” I’m talking about good, connecting, intimacy. Just like we talk about on the podcast, communication in sex is just as important as it is in talking. Find out what each other likes and enjoys. Finding the time and energy to make sex something special and different. Ladies don’t make him beg for it and men put in some effort to get her in the mood. Like I said in Tip #4. You want to turn her on? Validate her and enjoy!
So there you have it folks, The top 10 ways to make your relationship not suck! Even though Wes and I are not experts we know what works and how to have a relationship where we still enjoy each others company!
Go ahead give it a try and let us know how it goes!
*NOTE: If you want to dive deeper into these topics go listen to Life with the Chapman’s Podcast episode #15
We hope you enjoy our blog. If you haven’t heard our podcast you can go listen on iTunes. Subscribe and leave us a review! You can also follow us on Instagram @lifewiththechapmans